Ever have one of those days where all of the pieces align perfectly for you to get bonked over the head with exactly the right message you need to receive? Today was one of those days for me.
First, I overslept. I overslept because I forgot to set my alarm last night because I didn’t do my bedtime routine. I didn’t do my bedtime routine because I stayed up too late and was “too tired” to do what I should have done. I was too tired because I have been staying up too late most nights lately, even though I know it’s bad for me, because I’m not managing my time effectively (though hopefully last night’s calendaring session will have helped with that moving forward). And when I’m too tired I get into this cycle of oversleeping because I skip steps and my husband, who is awesome, gets up with the kids and lets me sleep because he knows I’m tired. And then I run around like an idiot all day scrambling to get caught up and then I stay up too late to get ahead and the whole thing repeats.
So, this morning I overslept. And because I overslept I missed my run. And because I missed my run, I’m now behind again on my goal of running 100 miles this month and trying to figure out how to make that happen. (I see a few back-to-back 10Ks in my future, FYI). Because I overslept, I also missed out on my morning cuddle time with the boys, which made them grumpy and a handful for Jesse all day — and also really eager to run up to me while I was working and loudly announce cool things when I really couldn’t interact with them about it, which made them and me very sad.
And because I overslept, all of those things happened and also, I got to my desk late and didn’t have time to adequately prepare for my day, which always leaves me feeling off and like I’m constantly behind, even if everything is actually fine.
And because of all of that, I just felt like I let everyone down all day. It’s an awful feeling.
It put me in exactly the right position to hear the message I got tonight on a very special personal development call that Jesse and I were part of a small group to qualify to attend through some of our Herbalife activities. It wasn’t a message I hadn’t heard before, but you know how you can hear something several times but you’re just not listening because you don’t fully get it?
Tonight I fully got it.
I’m paraphrasing rather liberally here, but the message was this:
Our lives are a representation of the thoughts we carry around in our heads all day. Don’t say, ‘I don’t know how’ or ‘I can’t.’ Say, ‘I’m going to do whatever it takes to make it happen.’ Believe in yourself. Unhappy people focus on what they don’t want. They don’t want to be broke, to be lonely, to have a job they hate, to be sick, to be fat, to be tired, to be WHATEVER. And they put all their thoughts and their energy and their heart into what they don’t want.
You have to change your mindset to change your life. Focusing on what you DO want, all the time, no matter what is like getting a GPS for the universe and entering the address of where you want to be into it, so you have the directions to get exactly to that spot. Change your mindset from the things you don’t want; focus on the life you DO want, and do whatever it takes to get there.
All day, I didn’t want to have woken up late. But the fact is, I did do it. All day, I didn’t want to have skipped my run. But the fact is, I did do it. Wasting time and energy wishing the truth wasn’t true, which I realize now is seriously all I did today, was a complete waste of time. It programmed my GPS to go backwards, to a place I don’t even want to be. Which is why I felt crummy about myself all. day. long. Because I told myself to.
I woke up, after a good sleep, in a warm bed in a safe, pleasant home, surrounded by people who love me, and went to a rewarding and lucrative job that allows me to provide for my family while doing things I enjoy, and then I got to spend my evening helping people improve their health and their lives. How is that not an amazing day???
After I got off the call tonight, I sat down to do this post and decided to clear out some pages I had bookmarked earlier, articles friends had shared on Facebook that I wanted to read. The first one I opened, about 5 minutes after this call ended, is titled “The average person complains 30 times every day. Would you like to stop?” Yes. Yes I would. Which is why the healthy part of me flagged that article earlier today, and why the healthy part of me knew after listening to that call tonight, knew that now would be the right time to read the article.
There are seven tips for stopping complaining, and they’re great. You should go read them.
But this quote at the end drove it all home for me, everything int he article, everything on the call, and everything that happened all day and even really all this month, while I’m striving for major change. Here it is:
“The opposite of complaining is gratitude. We should talk about things we are thankful for rather than things we are unhappy about. Our minds are like steering wheels, they take us in the direction we point them. If we focus on positive things, we move in the direction of greater happiness and more success.” – AComplaintFreeWorld.org
I have read this quite probably a dozen times before today. I have a ComplaintFreeWorld.org bracelet and have been following the site for years. But today, finally, I get it. I really, truly, viscerally get it. Complaining, even when I think I’m right and it’s justified, is just steering me farther and farther from the things I want.
I want to be above average. I want to live a life of joy and gratitude every day. I want to spend quality time with my kids every morning and evening. I want to have a fun and fulfilling relationship with my husband. I want to run or do something else that makes my body feel powerful every day. I want to create an example for my children to follow, one that will serve them well in childhood, adolescence, and adulthood. I want them to be proud of me, and i want to deserve it. I want to live an amazing life that inspires others to pursue their own amazement. These are the things I want. These are the things I need to focus on, because this is where I want my GPS to go.
What do you want?
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