This is how I feel right now.
Today is 4 months exactly until my due date and last night I had a complete breakdown when I realized how much further I still have to go.
Both of my arms hurt (right from the old PICC and allergic reaction to the wing guard and left from the new PICC and what we now think is a latex allergy), my acid reflux is so bad it makes me cry, I’m getting horrendous Charlie horses in my calves and feet, my nausea had abated but is coming back, and my belly is already so big with twins at 22.5 weeks that I can barely move around with what little energy I have.
It took me three hours to vacuum my house yesterday because I had to keep lying down for 10 minutes every 5 minutes. I feel like I’m never going to be normal again and I’m scared that I will hate my babies when they finally come. I feel guilty for wanting them to come early because what if they do and there’s something wrong with them?
Oh and on top of all that I have a yeast infection and I’ve had a horrible cold for 3 weeks and I’m STILL ridiculously constipated. And one of the babies keeps kicking me in the liver and it hurts like crazy.
I know rationally that of course I will make it through, of course I won’t hate my babies, of course things will get back to normal, but I’m just so scared and so sick and tired of being sick and tired that it’s hard to remember these truths and embrace them because what’s happening right now is so miserable.
Other moms with HG or other pregnancy complications, how do you get through this?
Pingback: Managing Depression and Anxiety During Pregnancy